After 4 Posts in One Day

Q:  Is there anything I need to be aware of for this journey?

A:  Balanced:  balance in relative energy level as well as balance in relative focus

I:  I take this to mean that I need to remember to attain a sense of balance in these efforts.  Use energy towards this project but not all of it, and remember that there are other areas of my life which I need to put forth energy into.

Keep a balance of focus and dispersement regarding this journey.  Eye on the goal (focus) but allow room for awareness of seemingly random ideas, thoughts, and connections between the sets/ideas I’m working on (dispersement).  And perhaps, awareness that not everything will fit int a neat little package (balance of focus & dispersement).

Seeking Core Beliefs and Meaning

So, why a Tarot modification or a Divinatory System at all?

Well, supposedly the Tarot is based on Archetypes common to all people regardless of ethnicity, beliefs, etc (ok, maybe that is a bit egotistical to believe that one’s symbol system is universal).  Unfortunately, not even Tarot enthusiasts seem to grasp where these Archetypes stem from.  Which I think might be one of the reasons it’s so ‘hard’ to study/learn the tarot.  Also, it’s not necessarily a complete system.  And the claimed correllations?  Um,…yeah…I’m sure someone’s Seeker is Finding some meaning in all that.  But mine sure isn’t.

What I did Find on the tarot that made sense to me was on www.levity.com/alchemy/mantegna.html .  Here it shows how the Trump cards are divided into

• 10 social stations of humanity (from beggar to pope)
• 10 muses
• 10 liberal arts / scholastic basics
• 10 cardinal virtues / ‘Spirits’
• 10 cosmic spheres

It was this site that prompted the idea in me that one can build a system by using Sets of Archetypes or Sets of Universal Principles.  (Ok, well, a combo of this site and www.octagod.com’s “Athiest Tarot”.)

Basically, creating a tarot-type system would encourage my stripping away a lot of …hmmm..garbage?….away from my core beliefs, discover my core beliefs, and maybe be able to communicate them somehow (symbolically?) without having to ‘prove’ anything to anyone else.

Another benefit of a ‘divination’ type system is that it provides a tool for altering how I view things, would help me break the bonds of old undesired and unneeded beliefs, and provide practice in Finding whatever I want to Seek…(ie finding a meaning or pattern in the cards, and/or in my life).  Also it opens doors to finding a social outlet and hopefully a safe place to exchange ideas without being bombarded with attacks on poor logic, reasoning skills, and “Truth”.

While I am learning to break old belief bonds and practice Finding meaning, I think I’ll use the Easy Tarot System found at www.tarotstudies.50webs.com/easy_tarot1.shtml and www.tarotinstitute.com .  And as I Find each Universal Principle or Set which I want to incorporate into my world view, I will practice with those as well.

As Below, So Above

Another phrase/concept that catches my attention is the ‘as above so below’ thing, but my mind seems to twist it into ‘why can’t it be more like “as below so above”?’

Each of us are made up of parts/processes which are made up of parts/processes, which in turn are made up of parts/processes, and so on until we reach past the subatomic level.

We each also are parts/processes of yet another part/process which is a part/process of anothe and another and so on until we get to the universal level or even beyond.

This has slowly become one of my base concepts as a Seeker-Finder.  But instead of looking macrocosmically, ‘divinely’, or humanily, I’m turning my attention to the microcosm.  My assumption is that we are complex forms of the microcosmic parts and processes (and that the ‘divine’ is merely a complex form of us…hence a complex form of the microcosm).

What sucks most about this search of mine is that I sucked at and hated the sciences.  And not much of those emotions have changed, lol.  So I expect a long, gruelling process with lots of mistakes.

And guess what…?… I expect that that is the experience I will ‘Find’, lol. 

What the Seeker Seeks, the Finder Finds

Why am I even trying to alter my belief system?  Well, for starters, are they really even My beliefs?  Or are they the beliefs or systems of other people I’ve comin into contact with (ie parents, educators, friends, authors, etc).  If I’m drawing on ideas and claims of others, how do I know which are actually mine?  and really, can any of them actually be mine?

I read somewhere that “What the Thinker Thinks, the Prover Proves” and elsewhere “What the Seeker Seeks, the Finder Finds”.  The concept behind these two phrases always rings something deep inside me.  The concept makes a lot of sense to me, and even explains to me why there are so many ‘justified’, ‘rationalized’, yet conflicting opinions/beliefs out there (and in me).

It also makes me think…If what I think I prove, or rather, if what I seek I ‘Find’, then what is it that I Want to Find/Prove?  Ok, well, I don’t want to Prove anything to anyone else.  So I’ll stick with the Seeker-Finder phrase.

What do I want to Find?  What beliefs do I want to have?  This question is why I’ve turned to ‘occult practices’ (ie ‘magick’ and ‘tarot’ etc).  Psychology seems to like stating it’s theories/beliefs, but those often conflict with …well..with my own observations and thoughts regarding individual psyche.  And while many of the magick systems out there also tend to state their beliefs and encourage belief in their system, they are also founded on the concept that…we make our own beliefs, and those beliefs effect our world views, our interactions with our environment (including people) and our behaviors.  The psyche ‘alchemical’ process seems to revolve around altering your beliefs and practices (behaviors, actions, etc) so that they align with your (each individual’s) ‘True Will’.

And this is my goal… To align my beliefs and practices to reflect how *I* want to view the world, its inhabitants, and its processes.

That Annoyingly Well-Traveled Path

It’s amazing how engrained some concepts can get into one’s head, and how difficult it can be to get it out, break it up.

Part of me feels as if something is wrong with the dispersed/directed part…’because it doesn’t lead to Fire, Air, Earth, Water’ and all that those interpretations have been said to lead to.  While I know that there is got to be a better something to cover the dispersed/directed part, I’m more bugged by that part of me that wants to bring it into alignment with the “wet/dry” thing, when that’s not particularly relevant to what I’m aiming for.

It’s like a path that the mind is so used to taking, that is well cut, maybe even paved, but it’s not taking you in the direction you want to go in.  In fact, it’s taking you away from where you want to go.  But you can’t find a road that will take you where you want to go.  Nor do you have the tools, really, to make a new path, even a simple one.  All you’ve got is a pocket knife and your own body/will.  Well, and your mind too, but since really I’m describing Me, then we already get the idea that the mind (and will) are relatively weak for this particular job, heh.

Basically, I’m irritated that I keep ‘blindly accepting’ someone else’s system instead of figuring out my own ideas.  Worse:  never really knowing how to communicate what are my own ideas.

Current Interest

Monday May 12, 2008

Current Interest?     Tarot readings (again).

But this time I’m working on my own system.  Well, more like cleaning one system (symbol and meanings) which align with my Universal Priniciples thoughts and making that system more similar to something kin to the Tarot (but not correlative to the Tarot).

After a few days (a week?) of intensive searching, I found something called “The Athiest Tarot” at www.octagod.com .  It’s a good start and really really pointing to what I want.  I’ve also found a couple of sites with some good learning-to-read tarot articles.  (uh, I seem to have lost a site address )  www.tarotinstitute.com  is a site that had some absolutely great beginning to read ideas/methods.  And this afternoon I made a breakthrough in one of my Universal Principles sets. 

• relative level of energy:  {arrow pointing up} high (fast, hot) vs {arrow pointing down} low (slow, cold)
• relative level of directedness:  {two horizontal arrows pointing away from each other} dispersed (wet) vs {two horizontal arrows pointing inwards towards each other} focused (dry)

It sort of lines up with the Greek elements of Fire (hot/dry), Air (hot/wet), Water (cold/wet), and Earth (cold/dry).  One difference is that it’s more along the lines of either a subjective experience of how much energy we have available and how well we are able to direct that energy towards whatever goal.  Or maybe, It can also be used to observe very simple processes regarding energy and its movements.  The seasonal stuff (including moistness vs dryness) would be an analogy or metaphor of the simpler process…or the process being shown on a grander scale.  It will likely go through some changes in time.  But for now it’s a good start to build up as well as to learn to read from.

These two..axioms??…make up 9 concepts.  And so 9 cards were made with each card symbolizing one of the concepts (High, Low, Focused, Dispersed, High/Focused, High/Dispersed, Low/Focused, Low/Dispersed, Balanced).  Maybe eventually I’ll post the simple diagram for it so you can get a literal feel for each concept.

***

Q:  What can I expect from using this particular set?

A:  A relatively High level of activity.  (Note:  as I was ’shuffling’ the cards, this one fell (jumped?) out.  So I picked it as the answer.)

I:  I can expect a relatively high level of activity from using this particular set.  This could mean that I’ll use it relatively often, or maybe even that it will come up relatively often (for now at least, heh).  (This much would be true in as much as it is currently the only set I have at the moment.)

Dispersement and Focus are ‘about normal’, according to the card.  Heh…if you only knew just how much dispersement over directendess is considered ‘normal’ for me, lol.

Looking at the card, in this context, I feel good about it.  It’s exciting to thikn that I might actually get somewere with the readings and the figuring out what my ‘beliefs’ are regarding Universal Principles.  In fact, this afternoon, when I finally figured out (for now) the dispersement/directedness aspect, I felt such a profound sonse of peace…no, not peach ..more like a great weight had been lifted off me, opening up my energy flow which I went and used elsewhere.  My mind isn’t trying to hard to solve the problem, nor am I feeling so frustrated and hopeless about getting anywhere with this new project.  In fact, I felt as if I’d successfully taken my frist step (one step forward).  I haven’t felt ’successful’ in a long time.

Yeah, I like the feeling this card gives.  I look at it and I feel buoyant.